PERFECT GIBBERISH X ON FORGIVENESS 5/3/14

My idea of forgiveness is letting go of resentment that does not serve your better interest, ridding yourself of negative thoughts. All they do is make you miserable. Believe me, you can fret and fume all you want, but whoever it was that wronged you is not suffering from your anguish whatsoever

DELLA REESE

 

Forgive and forget was such a cliché growing up,

When friends hurt you or people cheat you,

When your friend mistakenly or purposely pushes you while playing,

There was always that third party; a mum or teacher or friend that would say ‘forgive and forget’,

 

Growing up the term changed, people started to say ‘let it go’ which makes a lot of people think “don’t you get it, can’t you feel my pain!

Even I became a queen of those cliché phrases

'It is well'

'Let it go'

'Forgive and forget'

'This too shall pass'

Are some of my favorites phrases, saying them with the hope that I lift the persons spirit.

 

I became aware of how ignorant we are about the worth and meaning of those words!

We use those phrases so loosely; they are just conversation keepers for us!

 

As someone who never considers holding grudges and tries to always express how I feel the moment I feel it,

I never had strong reasons to explore forgiveness.

I just believed that since I wasn’t thinking of what people did and since saying hi back at them if they say hi meant I had forgiven them and let things go.

 

Recently I realized that Forgiveness is beyond just saying I forgive you!

Or saying surface His! and HELLOs! to those who hurt you.

 

There is a secret behind truly forgiving; there are rewards that come with it!

When you really forgive you will know because

When you don't truly forgive you live in bondage,

Not physical bondage but in emotional, spiritual ones!

 

A while ago I realized what our subconscious does;

How it makes decisions on our behalf,

Fighting the battles we have been meaning to fight but don't have the strength to,

Dwelling on things we are comfortable in

And in the same manner, living in total bondage when we don't forgive, pulling up a wall that not only doesn’t let you fall into traps again, but also keeps good things out.

It keeps out creativity, our chances at good friendships and relationships.

It changes us and makes us impenetrable and uninterested in the things that make us happy.

 

It took me about 3years before I eventually was able to start writing again, the post on insecurities was the gift and result of forgiveness.

For someone like me that started with a blog about my write ups PERRFECT GIBBERISH, not being able to get inspired enough to write felt like a trap and I knew I was in bondage, I didn’t even realize the source of the bondage.

Until I took time to check what was different in my life and I realized that hours before I wrote the post I had truly forgiven two people that hurt me, I had sincerely checked up on them and truly cared about what they were saying! I had been having conversations with them but I truly listened and cared for the first time in a long time.

And significantly it was on Valentine ’s Day.

 

Though forgiving people that betray your trust or hurt you one way or the other might seem hard,

It actually is hard and it takes time, here a some steps to follow;

 

-           give yourself time to nag and scream and maybe cry about it

-          Call timeout then let yourself heal

-          Then forgive yourself and the person or people

-          Talk to the person and make sure you truly let go

-          Then keep living and giving people a chance, trusting that no two people are the same.

-          Try also not to hurt people while you are at this process.

 

Even though forgetting might seem like a choice that we don't have the power to make,

Letting go is equivalent! And that we have a power to.

 

Take time to think of anyone you haven’t forgiven, they might not be worth your forgiveness but that is the very reason to give it.

Also if you have hurt anyone it might be time to ask for forgiveness and earn it.

They are not worth tying your progress down.

I am grateful I forgave because now I have been inspired to write again.

After all the bible says;

Forgive us our sins just as we forgive those who have sinned against us.

MATTHEW 6:12

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

EPHESIANS 4:32

(Also read MATTHEW 6:14, HEBREWS 12:14–15)

 

x

D