FALLING IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN

'You harlot' was the last thing I heard as he charged towards my direction, hands stretched out so far towards my face like he was ready to hit me. 'Chuck said it, you are an hustler' was the next statement he made as he barely missed my face with his hands.

Everyone we came with was there, including the married man that I had somehow managed to be so smitten by. I knew I was smitten and although I kept convincing myself it was the 10 shots of tequila topped with the glass of gin and tonic I just had that made me feel that way, I knew deep down that was a lie.

I was high of course, but I, a rational and objective over thinker was also so attracted to a married man that I had said yes to dating him sometime during this night.

If only I had known that I would have met someone so incredible that would make two men fight for me, I wouldn't have or maybe I would have visited his club that day.

***

About a month ago,  At work, I got a text from my friend that he was having a get together for his birthday. This was a guy I had liked from the first time I met him and for so long after that but I wasn't sure how he felt about me. Even though we had moments, I didn't know what he wanted so he kind of made The thought of not being good enough for him linger on my mind.

After work, I went back home and I got dressed in one of my favourite dresses that belonged to my friend and went over to the venue of his get together.
On getting there all I could get was his attention divided by the thirty or so guests that were around as well. I sat in my corner thinking angrily why my phone's battery had chosen that moment to die. After about an hour of ordering, sipping and paying for my drink I decided to leave when two guys checking my long legs out across the room invited me for a drink!

This would be awkward I thought, the idea of moving across the room from one crowded party to a party of four, but an acquaintance who I had offered a ride urged me to let's chill for a few minutes so I took a sit and had one of the most intelligent conversation I have ever had at that time of the night about business, ethics and service and I could see that the guys were absolutely blown away.

They both got my number and we went our separate ways not after they had forced a glass of wine on us though. I left with no thoughts about those guys but so much pride in myself of how two people I thought were successful thought I was a very intelligent woman and also thought the world of me. The didn't shy away from telling me these things or giving me these compliments.

Not long after I get home, the quiet of the two, Barry sent me a message which I found a bit funny, he was off to catch a flight in the morning for a three weeks trip but he would message me once he lands in the UK. Which he did. For three weeks we sent messages back and forth, he offered to buy me gifts and I offered to pick the styles I wanted but he decided he could satisfy my taste. He did keep to his words and got me a pair of shoes which my friend convinced me is nice as well as chocolates my all time favourite gift.

We decided to meet up once he got back and after a few misses, we finally met up and decided to go hang out with his friends at a bar.

That was where I met Ben, his close friend and my married crush.

It was everything he said from thinking I'm the most beautiful person in the world to talking about God and life that started the jitters, we could both feel it by the time we left the room and we both were scared. He had convinced me to find him my twin to be his girlfriend and he also had managed to label me Barry's girlfriend throughout the conversations we had. I tried to correct him but I figured it was because that was who I came with but looking back now, I think he was trying to remind himself who I came with and might be with since he had little information about us.

I left them early, said my goodbyes Ben not Barry got me a cab and I went to pick my car up.

Over the next few days I thought about him. I tried to message him but I got no replies and so I continued to chat with Barry who had managed to upset me, and my friends who I continually showed his messages. I pitied him because I understood he didn't know being boastful wasn't a good look. He had made several comments about the kind of car I drove to people who kept asking him for favors to mistakenly sending me receipts worth three million in a bid to flatter me but I just kept feeling sorry for him.

I was learning to be more tolerant and to stop cutting bridges so I kept trying to understand him, I went out with him and met up with him twice after that and we made out, I kissed him and It wasn't so bad so that was a compensation.

I knew I wasn't going to have sex with him.

Sex is very important to me and the truth is It will always be important for me to choose the person I decide to share my body with, whether it is considered uncool, outdated or not.

I'm glad I made a decision not to have any form of sexual relations with Barry, because two days after I had left him with a hard on and ran home, he sent a message saying the previous day was Ben's birthday and he was having a hangout and I should come with a few friends, I invited my third partner in crime as the second one was busy in love with her new man. We got there, got in, got stares and waves across the room as we proceeded to start one of the most incredible, memorable and not-so-incredible night of my life.

*****

I sat adjacent to Barry who barely spoke to me, then I made my way to his side with Ben on my other side. Ben had a lot to say to me from counseling me on courage and faith to being prayerful. I was so smitten by this man that I told him how I wish he was younger and single.
he said he felt so many ways about me not just because I reminded him of a past lover but because he thought I was the most intelligent and beautiful girl he had ever met.
Not words I would normally believe but as he threw caution to the wind begging me to kiss him with his friend on the other side, I knew I had met someone who had a lot to teach me about love and life and just like kindergarten kids, we held hands under the table and caressed each other slightly on the back and thigh.

I never stay out overnight and it has always been my thing so I whispered to Barry I had to leave soon, Barry didn't care he was too caught up in between convincing his other friends he is buying a new car and telling them how much money he just made that I didn't matter but Ben commanded that I couldn't leave him and I had to go out dancing with them but what he meant was with him.

******

We stepped into the club, trying to find our table as Ben constantly asked me if I was ok and comfortable.
I had left Barry chatting outside and he seemed not to care for me so much.
I and my friend started to dance as I complained about hating clubbing, we danced and a few minutes later my friend was dancing with one of their other friends and I started to dance with Ben.


Minutes later, Barry forced his way towards me and screams "You Harlot" 
(cuts to the beginning)


******
Ben was the first man that I had met who wasn't afraid to tell me he wanted me not in a sexual way, he wasn't afraid to call me beautiful or defy friendship for me.

He was the first man who ever saw his friend charge towards me calling me names and protected me, apologized to me and didn't just want to hit and go or smash and go like the young ones call it now..lol.

He was the first man who sat in my car when his massive car was right in front of mine, apologizing for Barry's childishness, he was the first man to drive home behind me before heading back the same direction we came from just to ensure I was safe.
The first man to call me everything he needed, the first man to say to me "I want to know everything about you and your goals and plans and when you want me to step back just let me know as well'. The first man to tell me I needed to find myself a man soon selflessly, he was the first man who had fought another man for me and best and worst of all he was the first man that belonged to another woman that I wanted!

*****
Want to know what happened next?
Yes, this is based on true events.
xo